What would you do?

Crabby Abby · Post by **Crabby Abby** » Sun Feb 04, 2007 9:49 am

I'm ba-ack! and I didn't eat it. lolI brought a couple of fried chicken pieces with me but she surprised me by having cooked two chicken thighs for me. (I'm wondering if hubby slipped in a call or if that was her own doing). Right up till we sat down she told me she was kidding and she didn't put duck in it. Then during the meal my BIL said to her, "I don't taste the duck, where is it?" and she reached over to poke his dinner with her fork, gave a dark piece a jab and said, "Right there, that's duck." I bit back a comment until I realized that technically she wasn't lying. She didn't make the meal, she bought it like that and only had to cook it so when she she said I won't put duck in it or I didn't put duck in it, it was true. Sneaky and underhanded but true.I also brought a bottle of wine and she thanked me, looked at the face of the bottle and said, "Oh Debbie thank you but I don't like Pinot Noir." and I said, "I know, but I do!" heheh

KaraJo · Post by **KaraJo** » Sun Feb 04, 2007 10:09 am

quote:Originally posted by Crabby Abby:I also brought a bottle of wine and she thanked me, looked at the face of the bottle and said, "Oh Debbie thank you but I don't like Pinot Noir." and I said, "I know, but I do!" heheh HAHA!! That's hilarious. Good for you! I'm glad things went alright and you were able to have something you liked to eat!!

newhermiemami · Post by **newhermiemami** » Sun Feb 04, 2007 11:08 am

quote:I also brought a bottle of wine and she thanked me, looked at the face of the bottle and said, "Oh Debbie thank you but I don't like Pinot Noir." and I said, "I know, but I do!" heheh Hahaha good one...taste of her own medicine!!!!! Whoohooo.... CA-1, Mother-in-law-0!!! Too bad folks aint betting on the results of this dinner like they are the other bowl!

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Sun Feb 04, 2007 5:43 pm

I followed this thread with great interest. You know that you can never trust a meal at her house again. She was willing to deceive you because she wants you to eat duck unknowingly, enjoy the meal, and allow her to say, "See? That was duck! You can eat it and you are fine and it was good." She isn't doing it to be malicious or mean. She is doing it to teach you that you are wrong. She thinks the no duck thing is silly and obviously your husband does as well. (And to be honest, so do I. Duck is great. But that is not the point.)I would ask to meet with her. Take her to lunch. Or out for coffee or dessert. Make small talk throughout all the eating part. Then tell her the honest truth. Tell her that it really hurt your feelings that she was planning to sneak duck into your meal. Tell her that you love her and want a good relationship with her, but you feel like you can't trust her to not put duck into future meals because you know she wants to teach you a lesson. It might help if you get a little emotional although I don't think that is your style, you strike me as more the sarcastic type and that approach will not work with this woman.I would tell her that you know she thinks your not eating duck is silly but that it is something very important to you and you need her to respect that. I would also point out that you are not asking her not to eat duck, and when she cooks it you are happy to bring your own food along. By planning to trick you and asking your husband to be in on the plan, she has changed your relationship.Be very soft voiced and sweet. Don't force eye contact and look down a lot. If it is hard for you to do this, tell her it is hard. Emphasize that you love her and you love her son and you want to be able to trust them both and that this was not a laughing matter to you. For this to work and repair/help your relationship, it CANNOT be confrontational. Then ask her to promise not to try to sneakily feed you duck or any other food you can't/won't eat. It is the sneaky part that is the problem here and that is what you need to address or your relationship will deteriorate.At the end of the meal, hug her and tell her you love her. That is what I would do. Good luck with all this.Vicki

Crabby Abby · Post by **Crabby Abby** » Sat Feb 17, 2007 2:57 am

My MIL is coming to sit for us tonight and I presently have a hydrated brick of EE in a lobster pot on my stove top. Hubby asked what it was and I spontaneously replied, "Your mother's dinner." He didn't find it funny but I'm laughing so hard I'm wheezing and that was 15 minutes ago! I know, I'm petty.

breezeetew · Post by **breezeetew** » Sat Feb 17, 2007 3:13 am

CA you are too much like me!

Nicole · Post by **Nicole** » Sat Feb 17, 2007 3:10 pm

LMAOShe might like the EE with a side of duck.